Wednesday, January 9, 2008
Not all Sunshine-y
I am normally a pretty upbeat person. Ask everyone around me. I don't let stuff bother me. The last two days have really beaten me up. People who are not part of the China adoption community just don't understand the upheaval that China is creating. And what is sad is that the children are the ones truly being hurt. China is a prideful country. I want Brynn to be proud of China. I respect the pride. But, this whole trying-to-save-face-in-front-of-the-whole-world thing is really tiresome. Most people in the civilized world know that China allows international adoption. This isn't big news. Now that the Olympics are only a few short months away, they decided that they don't want it to be known that they don't take care of their own, that many babies and children are in orphanages, that special needs kids (kids who aren't "perfect") aren't wanted. Well, guess what? Most people already know this. This isn't late breaking news.
Kevin and I are planning on sticking out the wait. We don't have the finances or the energy to start with another country. And, truly, we love China. We love the culture, the people, the beauty of the counrty. I'm just not in love with the higher ups in the Chinese government that are playing with my life. How dare they leave children in orphanages while there are 20,000 to 30,000 families wanting to take care of them. All children deserve love. How many are truly getting that? How many kids are going to "age out" in 10 years and be sold in slavery or prostitution or work in sweat shops their entire lives because some boss wanted to save face? It just plain sucks.
But my life does go on even if it is in limbo and probably will be for many years. Last night Brynn curled up on my lap under a blanket and played with her LeapFrog ClickStart computer. It was the best feeling in the world. My daughter loves me without question and Kevin and I can't imagine our world without her. If only #2 was here to complete our little family. We love her already. She is a part of our life, a part of our heart.